The Tibetan fox looks like an asshole.

Hey blags,

I got bored today. And when I get bored, incredible things get discovered.

First, I stumbled upon a blog that I’ll be wasting a lot of my time looking at moving forward. It’s called Creepy Animals and, since my readers are often pretty smart (or at least British), I’ll leave you to figure out what it’s about. Here’s a hint: it’s not about nothing, like my blog is.

Two things I love are animals and understated humor writing. This blog does both. More importantly, it features this animal:

This specimen saw The Fantastic Mr. Fox, but said he didn’t like it because Wes Anderson “stopped being cool after Bottle Rocket.”

This is the Tibetan fox. It appears entitled enough to be a protected species on the endangered species list, but don’t worry. It’s classified as a species of Least Concern (LC), which is the same value given to humans, and there are clearly way too many of us. Regardless, I am at least mildly concerned, as the species’ longevity may be endangered by the fact that these animals appear to be dickish, jaded and over the idea of sex, or that you need to have kids to be happy.

The Tibetan fox’s diet consists largely of inconsistent vegetarianism (not including cruelty-free chicken and fish), purchased at locally owned-and-operated restaurants (never chains). The animals make their dens in repurposed marmot burrows, which they use to protect their young, and vinyl LP collections from the harsh Tibetan sun, which would totally fuck up the audio fidelity.

Every autumn, the foxes migrate from their established habitats into new, lower-income ecosystems that are home to more dangerous animals (which they are naively unafraid of), slowly taking over and raising property values, to the chagrin of their subsequently displaced, original inhabitants.

OK, the fucking fox looks like a smug cultural elitist, you get it. That said, I don’t know why it’s not a more popular Internet meme. Here’s another picture:

“Oh … are you shooting me with a digital camera? … Oh, no, a lot of people are into that. I just think shooting film has more character, you know?”

OK, that’s all I know about the Tibetan fox. Don’t forget to give a shit about other, less socially off-putting animals like wolves, bears and birds that are actually endangered. Since you’re reading BLAG, I assume you’ll check out pretty much anything the Internet has to offer, so give this a click: http://www.defenders.org/.

Till whenever,

-BLAG

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